Bubbles

Sometimes it's really difficult to do normal things. I have a list a mile long (in my head) of things I want to do with the kids. When I'm myself, it all works out fine. When depression and/or anxiety takes over, everything is hard. I've gotten to the point that I know I'm not myself. The way I feel is thanks to depression and/or anxiety and not who I want to be. So I end up biting my tongue a lot because I know I wouldn't say those things if I were myself. I stifle my emotions a lot because I know those feelings will go away. I go through the motions (not always successfully) of being the mom I know I would be if I weren't having an episode. So sometimes I pretend to be me, which sounds really weird, buy it's true. For instance, when we got out these bubbles and made these little bubble blowers (I saw them on pinterest), I wasn't feeling myself. The all too familiar raw feeling in my chest was there. The frustration was there. I took these photos while trying to focus on the love I feel for my sweet kids. They are awesome. They deal with me and my issues so well. Their prayers literally are what get me through some days.

With all that being said, I think the kids enjoyed these. I was focused on trying to be my real self and don't remember a lot. They always love bubbles, so of course these were a must try!

I'm so glad for my camera. These moments are beautiful. So much good was happening around me. I might have missed it all if not for a simple click of a button.

Also, this little guy was by the door when we went inside...

...it's a tiny mantis! I have never seen one so small.